Lost in Translation
by Trisana Tennant
Summary: Russia decided to try his hand at magic again and while translating his spell, something gets lost, words are dropped and the wrong thing happens. He turns all the Nations into LOLcats.


**London: **

England had no clue that Russia was in his basement with a Klingon-English dictionary and a spell book. Russia frowned. He had the spell half-translated to Russian from the Latin but it mysteriously became a language he didn't know until one day America caught him looking at it. "Dude, that's Klingon." Then he had given him a Klingon-English dictionary saying "Sorry, there isn't a Klingon-Russian one."

So maybe the idiot was good for something. He stood up at his full height and said the spell. "IMHO, кошки"

Something was wrong and he knew it. It could be the fact that he was shorter than normal or the fact that he now had paws.

"О нет, что-то теряется в переводе."

From upstairs several voices were shouting. "What the bloody hell?" that was England.

"Cad é?" Northern Ireland there.

There were several Scottish curses flying around and then. "Rwy'n credu ei fod yn ddoniol." Wales.

Something tore down the basement steps and Russia turned to face four cats.

"Duit!" shouted one.

"Rwsia?" asked another.

The one that was certainly England looked mad enough to kill. "До свидания!" Russia shouted, jumping through the portal to take him back to his own basement,

England padded up to the previously used chair, jumped up on it and used it a board to get on the table. He looked over what Russia had left behind. "Looks like he was trying to do something else and something was lost in translation." He pawed a third book off the table and jumped down after it.

* * *

**Moscow:**

Russia's phone rang. He padded over to where it lay on the floor, courtesy of a call from Belarus and pressed talk, with his head. "Meow?" _Hello?_

"What?" that was his boss.

"Meow," he repeated, unaware that his boss could not speak cat. _Hello._

"Ivan Braginski, I swear if this is your idea of a joke, I'll…" that was the Secretary of State and former boss.

"We'll call back later," said his boss quickly and they hung up.

A Very Important Book started meowing. Russia stared at where it sat on a bookshelf, switching his tail, trying to glare it into falling.

"So why did we have to come here again?" That sounded like Estonia.

"Meow?" W_hat? _Russia was confused. Should he go see what the Baltics were doing or get that damn meowing book?

Estonia walked in and quickly accessed the situation. There was a large grey cat with purple eyes glaring at the bookshelf which was meowing. Therefore Russia must need that Book. He took the Book off the shelf and gave it to the cat. "Book," he called out to his 'siblings'.

"Book?" asked Lithuania.

"Book," repeated Latvia as the three opened their copies of the Book.

"Meow," said Russia's Book. _Cricket._

Russia pawed it open.

"Mine says 'Alfred is a dimwit,' that's not very nice." Lithuania told them.

"Mine says 'Fiddlesticks, Sabrina the Teenage Witch'. Wasn't that a TV show America had once?" Estonia was confused.

"Yeah, it was about a witch that was a teenager named Sabrina," Lithuania replied.

"Oh, really?" Estonia asked.

"Mine says Mr. Russia turned everybody into cats," Latvia said.

"Thank you, Latvia," sighed Estonia.

"Meow, me – l, kol" Russia informed them.

The Baltic cats cowered. "Hi," said Latvia. "How are you doing today, Mr. Russia?"

"Hello, Latvia, I am doing well, thank you!" Russia responded.

"Nobody cares about the Ashes, Australia!" England shouted through their Books.

"I'll win them this year!" Australia told them.

"Steven, aru," China said randomly. "You have fur."

"No, I don't, Yao. Oh, so I do."

* * *

**Athens:**

"You're a Neko," Greece said to Japan.

"Hai, so are you," Japan said calmly in reply.

"Hey, we're cats, Japan!" Turkey had shown up.

* * *

**Ottawa:**

"Who?" Kumajirou asked the cat that had just walked in.

"I'm Canada," Canada replied.

"Cat," said Kumajirou.

"Yes, I know I'm a cat, Kumakig."

* * *

**Berlin:**

Germany was not happy to be a cat. North Italy was jumping around. "Ve-Meow!"

* * *

**Rome:**

South Italy pawed open his Book. "Spain, you bastard!"

* * *

**Copenhagen: **

Denmark, Spain, Prussia, Franca and America were in the process of getting drunk when their Books started meowing. They were half-drunk when the talk about Cricket was running while there were "Ve-Meow!"s and "Italia, ruhe!" in the background. Spain fell out of his chair when Romano started shouting over Russia's "we should all be quiet, da?"

"Kolkolkol," was the next thing all nations heard.

"Dude," said America. "Russia turned us into LOLCats!"

France coughed up a furball.

* * *

**Translations:**

**Russian:**

**IMHO,****кошки – LOL Cats**

**О ****нет****,****что-то****теряется в****переводе – Oh no, something was lost in translation**

**До свидания - Goodbye  
**

**Irish:**

**Cad é? – What?**

**Duit – You**

**Welsh:**

**Rwy'n****credu****ei fod****yn****ddoniol – I think it's funny**

**Rwsia? – Russia? **


End file.
